Wannabe

I wanna be as lean as Cassie.
My routine is to get my ass out for jog 2x a week minimum.
Lift some weights to tone my flabby arms.
Crunches for my ABS!!
Will Kickboxing or Yoga help in any ways?

I want my hair to be like hers..
Shouldnt have cut my damn hair!!
Its in a mess now.. -.-
God please help to let it grow faster.
Anyone has any tips in making it grow faster?

Random

Was browsing through some old photos of mine and realised that I've aged!!
Same goes for the people and living organism around me.
We, the family, grew stronger after all our losses.
Stella told me that she'll sure cry on her wedding day.
This is due to the loss of my Dad which made the wedding not so complete.
She is the one who fought with my Dad no matter how big or small things are.
She is the one who is so daring to challenge my Dad in everything.

Thinking about what she said, me too had the same feelings.
I almost gave up my studies because of my dad.
I told myself that there's no point continuing without my Dad attending my convocation.
I seriously miss my Dad so much that I feel as though he's still around me.
I know that he must be feeling proud of her daughter after going through so much.
Managing my school and work at the same time.
Learning to pick myself up from all the pit holes and yada yada.

Found some old pics of Ody when he was abt 5mths old..

Shaun w Ody


Ody in car


Ody waiting for FOOD


Ody Now















Pebbles @ SKC

Nobody Loves Me

It's the nobody loves me day again.
After reading blogs, articles and others, I've realised that life is really short.
Things happen even before you know it.
Friendships, BGR and even marriage.
Many a times, events that happened caused strains to these relationships unknowingly.
Take me and Joanna as an example.
We both know each other too well that by reading her blog, I more or less understand what she's going through.
Though many a times we don't sing the same song.
Our stubbornness and ego have made us drift so far apart.
And that someone is always trying to so hard to resolve all the misunderstandings.
I took the initiative to admit my mistakes in the whole drama and now, we are still friends.
As for the rest of the gers, give me some time.
It's hard to face you gers when I've neglected you all so much.

Next, I'm feeling so insecure.
It's just the time of the month again I suppose?
This happened so many times in my life that I've lost count of it.
This moody feeling have caused many problems between me and Bear and of course, me and my family.
All I need is, "It's alright. Soon everything will be over."
Some kind of words to comfort the lost soul of mine, guiding and leading me to where I am supposed to.
Build up the confidence to move on.

Lastly, what is marriage?
Happened to read this blog through blog hopping and I realised that marriage is the worst thing to land into.
Your husband should be one that understands you and loves you more that anyone else.
And not one that finds you a nuisance.
Does it mean that after marriage you'll have to accept whoever and whatever he is and does?
sigh..

Relationship is just so fragile.
It breaks without needing a single touch.

Stress Out Relieve

Bear brought me to Keppel Bay for a short walk and dinner.
We got there just in time for sun set. (our 3rd sun set together)
No romantic setting but its enough for us to relax with the breeze, looking out into the sea, picturing the far future.
Enjoyed this nice moment with my Bear.

Bear looks like Onion Head

Random

Can't believe that I'm such a blur sotong (another word for it is STUPID) yesterday.
I took the wrong bus twice in a day.
Once for lunch and the other back to Yishun.
I hate it when I have to rush from one place to another when I know that traffic is a total killer.
Argh.
Spent $ on cabbing back when I'm so broke!

Next, brought Ody out for walks at like 0530 in the morning everyday.
Cats are just everywhere in my neighbourhood.
This is because of the number of Malays living around the area too.
The cats are just so damn irritating.
I've trained Ody to ignore them yet they are always trying to annoy him.
Whenever Ody saw cats, he'll walk away as thou he saw nothing.
Cats on the other hand, are always trying to challenge him!
Argh..
One even followed all the way to my door step after Ody's morning walk.
WTF?!
Anyway, I hate STRAY CATS as they are just so irritating!!

Anniversary

Bear and I celebrated our 1st yr tgt.
Thou I know that it's not nicely planned, nevertheless it was a smooth sailing one.
I got him a extra large balloon and made him carry it around..
Next was an orange Polaroid camera, then an orange scuba diving party tank and all the other colleges that make up a scrap book. :)
Everything was just so orangy even the place that we went for dinner!
Will try to scan all the Polaroids and post them up soon...

I so hate my bangsMe & Bear
Me & Bear again
Yummylicious
Ox stew!!

Kisses
I simply love this balloon

Doggies Day Out

Was supposed to head down to U-Pet but it was raining.
All of us ended up in Adeline's place for the planned pot luck.
The food is really delicious.
Me as a small eater I took 2 bowls of fried Udon, loads of cheesecake and my homemade potato salad. =)
I have to broadcast that they can really cook!!

As for the poochies, they had a whole load of fun.
Ody initiate play with Cobi but was ignored.
So this lil rascal is waiting for the arrival of Divot to play ROUGH!!
And so that was what really happened and he got loads of spanks from me as he initiated the play yet he growled!!
Such a ill mannered dog.. -.-
Ody is really a small dog with tonnes of attitude.
Divot is really a very macho boy with load of strength to pin Ody down with a slight tug.
Cobi, the introvert that loves to go around sniffing buttocks.
and Tin Tin, the humper that is always trying to hump Ody. -.-
By the end of the meet up, Ody was wet with saliva of both Divot's and TinTin's.

Didnt follow Kiki and family down to the groomer as I have Ben with me and was rather tired.
Bathed Ody and he slept like a log on my bed till late.
Am so proud of him these days as he is able to walk into the cage to pee!! keeping my fingers crossed..
Thou he still pee ard the house when he can't control, clearing the mess on the floor is really minimised.
His actions and behaviour proves that he's independent enough and I need not give him as much attention as before.

Enough of my grandma story...

Ody @ Kiki's place
Cobi
Ben & Cobi
Ody & Cobi
Cobi
Ody trying to agitate Divot
Divot's side profile
Tum Jiak Ody
they are playing dog & bone
Check out Cobi's sniff
TinTin Smile
TinTin
Divot!!
Erm..
Cobi with his Daddy..

MEN

Are all men out for lust?
Been pondering over this question for quite some time.

To the men..
Have you asked a lady to hit the beach just because you want to see her in BIKINI?

To the women..
Have you been told or asked to hit the beach just because he wants to see you in BIKINI?

What are men thinking?
They will rather see other girls out there dressed sexily than you dressing in that?
Is it because you just don't have the assets or they just think that other guys are not supposed to ogle at you?
On the other hand, is it fair for them to ogle at women yet other guys aren't supposed to do the same?
Would you feel more confident if your girlfriend dresses well and have tonnes of suitors out there or otherwise?
Likewise, does guys know how to provide sense of security because this is the most important factor that women ask for.

Poems

Lies Of Clueless Deceit
by Melpomene

Within such words of beauty lays caution of true fault,
A lonely seed planted upon the silent soul of sweet remorse,
"To trust is to be trusted, While to lie is to be fooled"
Such quote of mine speaks to my heart with painful force,
While the future becomes nothing but a glimpse of burning past,
And lies upon deception cause heartbreak beyond ones relief.

Another face of simple nothingness sketched into depths mind,
A tornado of vicious confusion raps around a frozen heart,
As our relationship became nothing but lies of clueless deceit,
While tidal waves crashed over hurt body drowning my soul,
And tears of ones bright future evaporate into thin air,
Torturing my mind of insanity, beyond being ever whole.

Hollow throughout bones as my visions of your become dust,
The life you've come to choose is not love but perfect lust,
Decision become careless as your life will turn to mist,
The lies you began to tell will now haunt you in your dreams,
One thing to remember in life is its nothing as it seems,
Karma planted beautiful, upon the lips of a blue eyed devil.

---

Lies!!!

For so long I had no idea
Lies ran from your lips
As the stream runs to the sea
Did you ever truly love me?

You lived in another world
I was not allowed to enter
Other women were there
Did you ever really care?

So many words spoken
So many promises broken
Scheming that I fell prey to
Did I ever really know you?

All those years are now tears
My memories driftwood floating
The current flows too fast
To hold happy thoughts fast

I no longer know what truth is
Your wall of lies blocks my view
Happiness has been damned
As I fight to reach dry land

Love once held within its cup
Has long since trickled away
Lost to desert sands
Held by different hands

Was the cup ever truly full?
Was its existence just another lie?
As a widow I remember the past
Lies within reflections on pools of glass
By Cherry

Perfectionist

Have been trying very hard to be a perfectionist.
Trying to be a perfect daughter, a perfect sister and a perfect dog owner.
I agree that those are important but I have not try to be a perfect girlfriend.
Putting everyone before Bear, giving more and more disappointments.
Thinking of what I've done for him though it might be insignificant, loads of effort is put into the things that I did.
Did he realise that?
Many a times, I choose to keep mum as not to pick a fight but as time goes by it snowballed into loads of problems and the flame in me blast into a fire.
Did Bear try to dig all this hidden truth?
Have we even communicated in that sense?
I've got all the surprises planned and now I think they'll be put aside.

Grooming Session

Brought Ody for grooming at Jadey's place on Saturday. =)
It was a rather impromptu session as my intention was to collect the dehydrated treats and to fur'n'away for grooming.
Went up to her place for grooming and saw her cotton, star and velvet.
Not sure where the CHH is but I'm sure she's hiding somewhere.

Cotton kept jumping on me for attention.
If I put her onto the floor she'll look at me and start barking.
Besides these, she licks me all over man.
My limbs are all her saliva.
She is always demanding for a tummy rub.
Hence loads of attention is spent on her.
This is a partial reason why Ody refuse to stay still while grooming cos HE'S JEALOUS!!

As for Star, he's a very lovely whippet.
He's a very affectionate one whereby his eyes will melt your heart.
Given that he is only 4 mths, he's very strong.
He's able to pin me down by jumping up on me.
Noticed the half star marking near his rear?
That was why he's named Star.
Nevertheless, Ody likes to play with him as he's the only thorn among the roses.

Didnt manage to take any pictures of Velvet as she is hiding below the grooming table.
She is such a lovely handstripped MS.
Love her cropped ears loads..
A super quality show dog!!
Very well behaved!!